Anger Mountain

This month the first and second graders learned about the concept of Anger Mountain. When I tell people I teach Character Education and they ask me what that is, if there’s time, I will often share about Anger Mountain. After I explain Anger Mountain to them, they always say they wish they learned about it in elementary school!

I learned about Anger Mountain from a national Peer Mediation training program that was brought to our elementary school over 25 years ago by our former counselor, Shirley Rivera. All third and fourth graders are trained in Peer Mediation during CE class. Over the years I realized that knowing about Anger Mountain is so helpful that I decided to introduce it in first grade.

Anger Mountain is the concept that anger can build inside of us until it explodes. We discuss clues that someone may be climbing Anger Mountain: starting with frowning, eyebrows knitted, then fists clenching, then stomping and yelling. Someone who’s at the top of Anger Mountain may be hurting other people physically and verbally.

Here’s an example of Anger Mountain, where anger builds over time: maybe you didn’t sleep well, so you have a hard time waking up in the morning and feel a little grouchy. Then your parent gets upset with you in the car because you made the family late for school and work, which makes you go up Anger Mountain a little more. Then maybe you feel frustrated at math. Then someone cuts you in line on the way to recess. Then finally, during recess, someone tells you that you’re not playing fairly at kick ball when you feel like he’s the one who’s cheating! So that last straw may put you to the very top of Anger Mountain, which, from outward appearances, may seem like an overreaction to peers, but actually the anger has been building little by little in you all day!

Thankfully our body cannot sustain raging at the top of Anger Mountain for hours and hours, so we must eventually come down. Afterwards, people may feel tired from all the adrenaline, they may cry, and they may feel guilt and regret if they hurt a friend or family member during their rage.

Sometimes something may trigger us, which causes us to zoom quickly to the top of Anger Mountain, rather than building and building over a longer period of time.

Another important fact to remember is that the angrier we become, the less able we are to think clearly.

I told the children that over the next several CE classes, we will talk about evidence-based strategies to get ourselves off Anger Mountain. Ideally, the lower down on the Mountain you are, the easier and less time and effort it takes to get off. That’s one reason why we practice identifying and verbalizing our feelings when we enter CE class. If we can get better at stopping and realizing, hey, I’m feeling kind of annoyed, we can try to address why and take care of it, rather than letting it fester and allowing other situations to pile on – and then after school our anger exploding onto possibly innocent family bystanders.

During class we’ve discussed that if we are at the very top of Anger Mountain, to try to move ourselves away so we don’t inadvertently say or do something we don’t really mean to those around us that we’d regret later. As we move ourselves away, it would help if we can tell others, “I need time to cool off.” That way those around us will know to give us space and hopefully also be more understanding.

We briefly reviewed a scenario where they witnessed a student at the top of Anger Mountain: what could they do to help? The children mentioned simply walking by and giving the student space (especially if they are not involved in the situation), letting the student know that when s/he is ready that they would play with them again, and letting a teacher know if there wasn’t one already helping.

After I’ve taught Anger Mountain to students, I have referenced it during recess duty. For example, if Billy is having a disagreement with Sally, and Sally gets to the top of Anger Mountain, I will tell the Billy matter-of-factly, “Sally is at the top of Anger Mountain right now, so we will talk about this again later [after she cools down].” Students will nod in understanding and be able to let go and walk away for the time being. They know that Sally will not be able to think and solve a problem at the top of Anger Mountain anyway.

So far during CE we’ve talked about our physical body, and how taking care of our physical needs can help with our emotions. For example, if after school we are hungry, rather than being “hangry” with our family, we can instead ask for a healthy snack. We also talked about the importance of sleep. Children need 10-12 hours of sleep a night. If we don’t get enough sleep, we can feel annoyed quicker with our friends, be less cooperative and patient with others, and have a harder time focusing on our schoolwork. Adequate exercise during the day can also help us to fall asleep.

We will continue to share more healthy strategies in the weeks to come, such as hugs, creative endeavors such as art or cooking, and helping others.

Managing our anger is such an important part of our lives at any age, and I am grateful that we can discuss it in elementary school!